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No sight, but still on the lookout for love

By Li Lei | China Daily | Updated: 2018-11-29 09:07
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Liang Jiangbo, a proofreader with the China Braille Press, types with the help of a Braille keyboard at his office in Beijing. Photo By Li Lei / China Daily

Parental pressure

In 2011, Liang was working as a radio host at a media company in Beijing when he met his fiancee, an able-bodied colleague. "We felt attracted to each other. We would often go out for food or karaoke with friends," he said.

Liang was concerned about whether he was handsome enough, if his girlfriend minded his disability and if he would be able to take care of her as well as an able-bodied partner. But in a country that once had a long tradition of parents arranging their children's marriages, his greatest fear was the objections put forward by his girlfriend's parents.

"When her parents learned about us, they were strongly against us being together, and there seemed no room for negotiation," he said.

However, the couple remained resolute. They have now been together for seven years, and her parents have accepted the relationship. Over the years, Liang has proved himself as a partner and won his girlfriend's parents over.

"Using a smartphone equipped with screen-reading software, I can order food for her online, and I can also hail a cab and wait at her office after work. If two people are determined to stay together, most problems won't remain problems," he said.

Shi Ran, a blind employee at China Braille Press, said parental approval matters for such mixed couples because it's almost impossible for them to be entirely independent of their parents after marriage.

"If the parents are not happy with the marriage, there may be problems that could be quite upsetting," the 36-year-old single woman said, citing the example of a blind friend who married another blind person.

"Parents on both sides were unhappy about the marriage, but the four seniors have to meet regularly because of their children's conditions. It is torture for everyone involved," she said.

There is no recent data on the marital status of China's 12.6 million visually impaired people, but experts agree that they are the least favored partners when disabled people choose to marry, along with those with intellectual disabilities.

According to a 1983 survey conducted by Teng Weimin, former vice-chairman of the China Blind Person's Association, less than half of the 1,000 visually impaired people surveyed in 10 cities nationwide were married.

"I doubt the number has risen significantly," the 64-year-old said. "In the past, overprotective rules meant it was unusual for disabled partners to divorce. But now divorce has become common if problems arise."

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