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Loss of a child sends families into crisis

By Lin Shujuan in Beijing and Qian Yanfeng in Shanghai (China Daily)
Updated: 2009-08-11 09:54

Not long after that first meeting, the parents decided to set up Star Harbor - so called because, in Chinese folklore, when a child dies a new star is added in heaven - to help support each other, as well as any family in the same position.

It now has around 250 members from 160 local families, who have been divided into 10 teams depending on where they live in Shanghai. They socialize together weekly in a rented office in the city's Zhabei district and also host charity events and celebrations for national festivals.

Loss of a child sends families into crisis

Members have begun to help bereaved parents in other cities to establish similar self-support communities, while many also volunteered in the earthquake-hit areas of Sichuan province last year to offer psychological counseling for those who lost children in the May 12 disaster.

"Star Harbor has given these people a sense of belonging as they understand and support one another," said Ke, who is an active event organizer. "We hope to take care of ourselves rather than rely on the government and the society for support.

"But mutual support is not enough. As we get older, we are becoming increasingly worried about our health care - how we are going to support ourselves in old age without children?

"It's about the lack of both financial and emotional backup. I don't think we have received due attention and support from the general society."

Groups like Star Harbor are scattered few and far between, with many parents remaining cast adrift and desperately unaware of the counseling and assistance available to them, according to a recent report in China Economic Weekly.

Experts and parents agree that subsidies will never be enough and some local governments have won plaudits for their attempts to take the initiative and launch multi-level insurance systems to ensure financial stability for one-child families against unexpected disease and casualties.

"There needs to be an insurance mechanism across China that ensures bereaved parents can enjoy their later lives as much as possible. Subsidies will not suffice," said Ni Kaiquan, a former official for the family planning office in Qidong, Jiangsu province.

In Shanghai, the authorities have teamed up with insurance companies to offer a universal insurance policy to cover children aged 30 days to 16 years old.

Since April last year, parents have been able to pay just 60 yuan a year - the exact amount handed out by the government to couples for an only child under 16 - to insure their young one. In the event of a tragedy, they would receive a maximum of 60,000 yuan in compensation.

It is just one of the 12 pilot schemes the NPFPC has rolled out across the country for single-child families.

The issue of adoption has also been raised as a possible solution to help bereaved parents and orphans or abandoned children move forward. However, the government dissuades older couples to take on youngsters due to their age, financial income and the attention children need, said Zhou of the NPFPC.

"I haven't seen many successful cases of adoption over the years," said Ke. "Many parents simply gave up the idea after thinking of the risks, like how big an investment they'll have to make and whether the new child would like to be with them after all.

"The best the government can offer is to help create special retirement communities for people like us. If we have such a place, we might be able to take care of each other, young or old.

"They could even build retirement homes for bereaved parents alongside orphanages. Then we can help take care of them, too."

Wang Zhuoqiong contributed to the story

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