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Humor Joke 幽默笑話

中國日報網英語點津為您精選語言地道的英語笑話，開心學英語。

世界上最好的售貨員

2007-11-21 09:44
Harry saw an ad in a window. It said: "Wanted. The Best Sales- man in the World. Top Pay."

2007-11-16 08:48
Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him. I was careful to call him a few days in advance to "warn" him that we would be coming.

逼真的戲劇

2007-11-15 16:40
When I taught the introduction-to-theater course at North Dakota State University, I required my students to attend the university theater's current production and write a critique. After viewing a particularly fine performance, one student wrote: "The play was so real, I thought I was actually sitting on my couch at home, watching it on television."

他的得數只比正確答案多二

2007-11-14 11:16
Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren't always smart enought to be accepted by the college.

拿破侖病了

2007-11-13 11:28
Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.

勢均力敵

2007-11-12 09:04
One day a lady saw a mouse running across her kitchen floor. She was very afraid of mouse, so she ran out of the house, got into a bus and went to the shops. There she bought a mousetrap. The shopkeeper said to her, "Put some cheese in it and you will soon catch that mouse."

送給女友的禮物

2007-11-09 10:58
At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Shall I engrave her name on it?" the jeweler asked.

園藝手套

2007-11-08 11:20

沒關系

2007-11-07 08:48
Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. "Uh-oh," I said, realizing my mistake. "I just make an illegal turn."

慎重許愿

2007-11-06 08:51
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.

最棒的銷售員

2007-11-05 08:00

Harry saw an ad in a window. It said: "Wanted. The Best Sales-man in the World. Top Pay."

" I' m a great salesman." Harry told himself." I can sell anything. I'll go in and ask for that job."

He went into the building and spoke to the manager.

大頭男孩

2007-11-02 08:41

地球為什么是圓的

2007-11-01 11:20
Teacher: Stone, give me three reasons why you know the Earth to be round. Stone: Ma says so, Pa says so and you say so！

選詞

2007-10-31 10:06
One day, John was back home after work. He found that his wife was shaking their daughter who was only half a year old. She said "Da-Dy" to the baby many times. John felt very happy because he thought his wife chose the word "Dady" to teach their baby.

把它堵在里面

2007-10-30 09:12
"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?" "No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to stop it."

父親的東西

2007-10-29 08:25
When Tom Howard was seventeen years old he was as tall as his father, so he began to borrow Mr. Howard's clothes when he wanted to go out with his friends in the evening. Mr. Howard did not like this, and he always got very angry when he found his son wearing any of his things.

女孩的名字

2007-10-26 08:32
When our daughter was born, we named her Myles, after my beloved late father, despite family warning that the name was too masculine.
Years later, when i felt she was old enough to understand, I explained to Myles, "Your name is very special. I named you after my own father because I loved him very much. I know he would be proud of you."

心目中的英雄

2007-10-25 08:27
Our granddaughter's second-grade class was asked to write about their personal heroes. Her father was flattered to find out that she had chosen him. "Why did you pick me?" he asked.
"Because I couldn't spell Arnold Schwarzenegger," she said.

小男孩與驢子

2007-10-24 08:25
A small boy leading a donkey passed by an Army camp. A couple of soldiers wanted to have some fun with the lad. "What are you holding onto your brother so tight for, sonny?" asked one of them.

纏住不放

2007-10-23 09:01
Returning from a golf outing, my husband was greeted at the door by Sara, our four-year-old daughter. "Daddy, who won the golf game? You or Uncle Richie?"
"Uncle Richie and I don't play golf to win," my husband hedged. "We just play to have fun."
Undaunted, Sare said, "Okay, Daddy, who had more fun?"

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